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Posted by / 24-Sep-2020 13:39

As much as I tried to keep my job out of the conversation in the getting-to-know-you phase of courtship, it's typical to ask what someone does for a living.

When I first became single, I had been doing porn for about a year, but I performed exclusively with women, which, for whatever reason, is more "forgivable" to a lot of people.

What I did find was that no matter what, it would shift the tone of the conversation. but it's there, the feeling that men get overwhelmed with the idea of a P_O_R_N_S_T_A_R. There's no guide to dating a sex worker and I hardly expect anyone to "get it right" on the first go.

Now guys would want me to send a selfie; they'd tell me how sexy I was despite the fact that I wasn't using anything more than fully clothed, decidedly neutral pics from my i Phone on my profile and my bio read, "Doe-eyed intellectual giant seeks Marcus-Aurelius type for disordered romantic attachment." Of course, too, they wanted to know all about my work. Having been an adult for a while, I've seen relationships that work and ones that don't, but the rule is that every couple is unique and they all have to negotiate the very normal human feelings of jealousy, insecurity, and self-interest. Tinder was too sexually charged for me because I was a sex worker.

I wasn't really interested in getting emotionally invested in someone else.

But I also didn't worry too much about what might happen if I ever wanted to date a "civilian," since I wouldn't have to explain much more than that I had sex with women on camera sometimes.

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They'd probably get into a high fiving contest with their friends.